TILTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

Bad play has caused me to tilt and lose more money. I read a post about how when you feel your going to play bad to go online and instantly buy something expensive for yourself. I purchased a Nintendo DS and have been testing my brain daily for the past week. Age 20 is considered perfect and my brain level is 21. I have beaten everyone I know in the Math section. I scored 100% and finished in 14 seconds. The Math problems are very simple but writing them down quickly is the difficult part. I was actually doing the problems 2 in advance in my head while writing the current problems answers. I also bought Call Of Duty 4 for Xbox 360.

I feel I have let Max (my coach) down and also myself. Max has given me some incredible knowledge and friendship. Despite this my own horrible mistakes have lead me to feel failure. When people assume I sit on my ass all day, wake up at 3pm, work for 2 hours, and jack off for the rest of the day it pisses me off. I work harder than you. I have much more stress than you. I would love for someone to explain their job and how they think it's more stressful. I would assume they would say something like well the job sucks and making money is stressful. My simple answer is; I can work more hours than you in 2 weeks and actually lose money.

I read another article about how a successful poker player quit his job as an air traffic controller and played poker for one year and made about 35% more money, got the perks of being self employed but actually considered it much more stressful than his previous job as an air traffic controller (often considered the most stressful job to have).

Ever throw up after a bad day of work? I have multiple times (from high stress levels not to relieve stress or try to be skinny or whatever). The good comes with the bad people. When you run bad and play bad it feels like your 6 and your dog died. Poker is a game about exploiting edges you have. Edges can turn quickly and you can lose your edge quickly and be forced to use skills to determine where you are in the hand.

You, along with countless others assume that it really matters if you have AA, if I call your raise with say 22 and the flop comes Q62, you would automatically assume your AA is still good and I would take your whole stack, you would be confused, pocket pairs flop a set 1 in 7 times so it's right to play them and often you will win a big stack when you do hit the set.

Here's an example of losing your edge in a hand quickly, lets assume again you have AcAh and raise preflop and 2 people flat call your raise, the flop comes Jd 10d 6c. Now your hand is not nearly as strong, depending on the players one could easily hold J10, 66, Axd, 89, 78d, KQ, KQs, 1010, or even JJ if the player is a nit. Again you would assume AA is good because it was good preflop and stack off with it. Off the top of my head the best I would assume against 2 random players would be about 60% post flop. You have to play your cards, your opponents, the board, bet sizing, patterns, time tells, are they slow playing, should you raise, what if they re raise, should I check, maybe check raise, whats this guys stack, how much money does the other player have, ok if player one bets and player two calls am I going to raise, check, or even fold, what if player 2 raises then I should probably fold right?, maybe he is a moron and I should call the raise oop and get it in on the turn or just shove now over top of them both.

It's a complex game that is never solved, perfected, or even close to being a complete science. Winning is possible in the short term and long term by exploiting others weaknesses.

Tomorrow I need to focus, accept losses, and play good because I know I can. I need to think about the long run and not the short run. I need to accept bad beats because you know what I put them on people too. I sucked out massive twice today, then made a bad bluff followed by a bad call on my part and boom back down to being up like $5. It's on me, I can't blame others for giving me the edge and getting unlucky, I have all the tools I need and now it's up to me to use them.